Timeline

What follows is a very rough estimation of what happened and when in the HILT universe. Due to the inaccuracy of ancient histories, loss of records in the nuclear war, and the violent suppression of education by the Conglomerate, much of the information is incomplete, and all the dates pre-nuclear war are approximations based on educated guesses by modern Hiltstorians.

Years are marked BC (Before Conglomerate) and AC (Air Conditioning. Sorry, I meant After Conglomerate)

NOTE: If you're too impatient for this, try our highly abbreviated timeline for crybabies.

The Corridor (9,000 BC)
Main article: The Corridor

In the year 2018, a nefarious criminal named Francois le Visage de Furet stole a recently developed, and still unstable, time travel device. Four agents were sent in pursuit, leading to a long chase through time, a chase which ended in the malfunctioning device transporting all of them to a parallel universe. The HILT universe, which had a Bronze Age era planet Earth with dinosaurs still living.

The High Gate (8,960 BC)
About 40 years after the Corridor, the last remaining of the Four Ancient Travelers commissioned a band of much younger (and much less reliable) adventurers to go try and seal the rift between the HILT universe and the Original Universe.

They did not succeed.

Battle for Supremacy (7,000 BC)
Main article: Battle for Supremacy!

Earth was at this time dominated by five major tribes. Shandücha, Tsukonia, Brewtan, and bitter enemies Los Lobos and R.O.M.A.N.

Throughout the generations, these five nations continued their battles, until finally in a decisive war Shandücha won a great victory, partly thanks to people and weapons falling into the still-unstable HILT world from other parallel universes.

Isle of Lucy (5,010 BC)
Main article: Isle of Lucy

Seeking refuge from Shandücha, a mad scientist named Doctor Raleigh Ochoa retreats to an uninhabited island to continue his unethical experiments in peace. His first creation are fearsome krakens, which wreak havoc on some castaways shipwrecked on the nearby Rum Isle.

Sea of Blood; Sea of Blood 2; Marcelot (5,000 BC)
Main articles: Sea of Blood, Sea of Blood 2: Harboring a Grudge, Marcelot

Mere years after this adventure, the five nations once again collide in an all out naval war in the vicinity of Rum Isle and Doctor Ochoa's creations, hoping to assert themselves as superior in the age of gunpowder.

On a nearby archipelago, similar chaos was happening.

Scramble for Rum Island (4,500 BC)
Main article: Scramble for Rum Island

Fast forward about 500 years into an era of modern-ish warfare. Planes, submarines, aircraft carriers and the like, now fiercely locked in battle for control of Rum Isle, featuring many of the five nations as well as smaller nations just now asserting themselves on the global scale.

War of the Americas (4,300 - 4,150 BC)
Main article: War of the Americas

Shortly after this devastating war, the five nations settled their differences and established an uneasy peace. A VERY uneasy peace. While their treaty forbade a war on their homelands, the continent of the Americas was mostly unclaimed, so as the nations grabbed for land, they found a loophole in their treaty by hiring mercenary armies to fight over the land for them.

Main RPG articles: I Like Trains, Die Hard on a Blimp, 100 Doors, Ojinjintka, Hunt for Hadropsey

Acquiring QH-29/The Great Accident (4,150 BC)
Main article: Acquiring QH-29

Approximately 50 years after the events of Ojinjintka, the great scientists of all the Nations came together in order to turn off the Nuclear Missiles developed under General Hadropsey. A group of superhumans were created to stop the cyborg, QH-29 from unleashing the bombs and destroying the world.

While the team was unsuccessful at stopping QH, they managed to save millions in underground domes.

The sequence of events was lost to history, the nuclear devastation practically wiping all life on Earth. In a great twist of irony, the area the most untouched by this apocalypse was Rum Isle, where the majority of inhabitants, and Dr Ochoa's creations, survived.

HILT Star Wars: The Search for the Falcata Fleet (4,150 BC)
''Main article: [https://hiltrpg.fandom.com/wiki/HILT_Star_Wars:_The_Search_for_the_Falcata_Fleet. HILT Star Wars]''

In the midst of this nuclear war, for reasons as yet unclear, a group of people were hurled from the HILT universe into yet another universe. One that appears very, very similar to Star Wars.

Knights and Stuff (4,000 BC)
Main article: Knights and Stuff

As people rebuilt Rum Isle, their technology fell behind to the medieval period once again, as well as losing their historical records. Legends survived of Ochoa's monsters, but no one took them seriously until a group of noble knights sacrificed themselves in the discovery. Many Mortys died to bring us this information.

Teenage Wasteland (3,800 BC)
Main article: Teenage Wasteland

Outside Rum Isle, the world was struck considerably worse. The majority of planet Earth was left a desert with only an occasional oasis to provide relief. Gangs of homeless criminals roamed, and many sinks were repaired.

The Maelstrom (3,600 BC)
Main article: The Maelstrom

A long abandoned city, home of the rift in the universe, suddenly shows the appearance of an incredibly valuable object. All the existing nations scrambled to put together teams and send them in to acquire the object before anyone else could.

Stabbed MANY 1 Dude in the Eye (2,489 BC)
Main article: Stabbed MANY 1 Dude in the Eye

"Stabbed MANY 1 Dude in the Eye (And 1 Guy in the Foot)" (or simply SM1D for short) details the events of one unlikely group of strangers, and their largely unsuccessful rise to power and fame in the HILT universe. The events in this game detail the events of the year 2,489 BC, or like, around that time, and involves cool stuff like prison breaks, bounty hunts, eye stabbings, and the like.

The Battle of Bollocks Tower (2,300 BC)
Main article: The Battle of Bollocks Tower

An asteroid is infested with teleporting spiders the size of cats! Will our three main heroes be able to fight them off? Who will sacrifice their lives to defeat the Greatest Threat once and for all? A story of friendship and loss.

Space Age (2,000 BC)
Main articles: Heist of Deception, Twin Diamonds, Message on Azriel V

Humanity has moved beyond their own solar system and inhabited/terraformed at least seven other solar systems, roughly equating to one per nation. This obviously causes much competition among them as they all vie to expand and grow more quickly than all the others.

Certain Death, Saving Ochoromana (1,200-1,000 BC??)
Due to the loss of records, it is practically impossible to determine even an approximate date for the events of Certain Death and Saving Ochoromana, but for simplicity sake this date has been chosen.

Main article: Certain Death

In an epic war the main HILT nations united to defeat Los Lobos, banishing them into a large spacecraft and set adrift into open space. As the generations progressed, deep space radiation mutated those on board and the records were lost, but eventually they managed to take control of the ship, land on a habitable planet in the Andromeda galaxy, and plot their return and revenge on the Snickers galaxy. When these things happened is unknown, but thanks to PG Copper's time travel Corridor device, they reappeared circa 1 BC. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Main article: Saving Ochoromana

A R.O.M.A.N asteroid research facility falls in critical peril as a terra forming experiment goes wrong. Tasked with restoring their colony and finding the reason for sudden monster attacks, a group of friends go in search for answers and escape. They are successful, with some leaving the asteroid to find contact with other colonies, while others stay to restore the facility to its proper functions.

The Conglomerate Saga (156 - 157 AC)
Main article: The Conglomerate

Faced with a desolate Earth, humanity had but one alternative. Begin researching terraforming technologies to salvage the planet. A discovery of Dr Ochoa's genetic research papers advanced the technology rapidly, and soon humankind had terraformed not only the Earth, but the entire Snickers galaxy (I prefer them to Milky Way). Planets were developed to the most luxurious of standards, religions devoted to sugar blossomed, curiosity peaked, and the French were banished to a far off world to themselves. Life was good.

But just as humanity reached its peak, they were invaded from outside. A horrific alien species called The Conglomerate. They crushed everyone in their path, and after settling into the middle 50% of the galaxy, they left people on the outer rim pretty much alone.

Until...

A hardy band of renegades led by Anton Zerp, descendant of a long line of noble Shandüchan warriors, discovered a cache of weapons, strategies, and info left behind by a Resistance force from decades ago. Among the cache, the long lost Shandüchan Code. Reinvigorated by this outstanding discovery, humanity begins mounting a last stand against The Conglomerate....

The Unknown King (AU End of Universe)
Main article: Unknown King

Taking place in an Alternate Universe at the end of their timeline. The Island of Aure Voir deals with the after effects of the Conglomerate taking over the Snicker Galaxy.